# food for thought....



## acjohnson53 (Nov 9, 2017)




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## Symthrell (Nov 9, 2017)

Those are some of the truest words I have ever read!


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## David612 (Nov 9, 2017)

It’s a nice picture and sounds like a deep question but I don’t think it really means anything.


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## Brother JC (Nov 9, 2017)

Really? So if the nicest guy in town beats his family behind closed doors, it doesn’t mean anything? His character stands in your eyes? Wow...


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## dfreybur (Nov 10, 2017)

Brother JC said:


> Really? So if the nicest guy in town beats his family behind closed doors, it doesn’t mean anything? His character stands in your eyes? Wow...



Abusers are extremely secretive.  If my ex-wife had not drunk dialed my family to apologize for beating me, they would not have found out until I called them with my new address when I escaped.  Back then only a few of the Brothers at lodge knew what I was going through.  They helped me prepare to escape and when the time came they helped me move out.

Most of my ex's friends to this day think she's the nicest party girl in town.  hey have no idea what happens behind closed doors.


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## Brother JC (Nov 10, 2017)

My point exactly.
I’m sorry for your experience, Brother Doug.


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## Ripcord22A (Nov 11, 2017)

dfreybur said:


> Abusers are extremely secretive.  If my ex-wife had not drunk dialed my family to apologize for beating me, they would not have found out until I called them with my new address when I escaped.  Back then only a few of the Brothers at lodge knew what I was going through.  They helped me prepare to escape and when the time came they helped me move out.
> 
> Most of my ex's friends to this day think she's the nicest party girl in town.  hey have no idea what happens behind closed doors.


Wow.  Sorry to hear that brother!

Sent from my SM-G386T using My Freemasonry mobile app


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## Warrior1256 (Nov 11, 2017)

dfreybur said:


> Abusers are extremely secretive. If my ex-wife had not drunk dialed my family to apologize for beating me, they would not have found out until I called them with my new address when I escaped. Back then only a few of the Brothers at lodge knew what I was going through. They helped me prepare to escape and when the time came they helped me move out.
> 
> Most of my ex's friends to this day think she's the nicest party girl in town. hey have no idea what happens behind closed doors.





Ripcord22A said:


> Wow. Sorry to hear that brother!


Same here!


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## SCStrong (Nov 11, 2017)

David612 said:


> It’s a nice picture and sounds like a deep question but I don’t think it really means anything.


 I can't see how one could think that ......  The statement totally encapsulates what character is.
Just curious  - are you a Mason?




dfreybur said:


> Abusers are extremely secretive.  If my ex-wife had not drunk dialed my family to apologize for beating me, they would not have found out until I called them with my new address when I escaped.  Back then only a few of the Brothers at lodge knew what I was going through.  They helped me prepare to escape and when the time came they helped me move out.
> 
> Most of my ex's friends to this day think she's the nicest party girl in town.  hey have no idea what happens behind closed doors.


Brother, sorry to hear of your experience. Glad you escaped. Best of luck going forward.


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## David612 (Nov 11, 2017)

SCStrong said:


> I can't see how one could think that ......  The statement totally encapsulates what character is.
> Just curious  - are you a Mason?
> 
> 
> ...


Yes I am a mason and really you think that is the measure of a man? What he does when no ones around? What he does in public is less than his other works? Hypothetically Gahndi for example amazing things but was awful to his wife and MLK would habitually cheat on his wife.
The meme is very simplistic and a life spent trying to improve oneself can’t be summarised in a quip. In my opinion
Look into those examples for yourself as I’m no historian and there is a bit of controversy around them how true they are I have no idea but good food for thought.


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## dfreybur (Nov 11, 2017)

Brother JC said:


> I’m sorry for your experience, Brother Doug.



Now decades ago.  Long enough ago that I evangelize abuse victims to escape as a way to repay those who helped me in my time of need back then.


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## Brother JC (Nov 11, 2017)

@David612  Given your hypothetical scenarios my opinion of those men would drop quickly. Sure, they did good, but their character would be forever tarnished in my eyes.
Andrew Jackson is a good example.


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## Bro-greg (Nov 11, 2017)

SCStrong said:


> I can't see how one could think that ......  The statement totally encapsulates what character is.
> Just curious  - are you a Mason?
> 
> 
> ...


Brother what town are you from


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## SCStrong (Nov 11, 2017)

David612 said:


> Yes I am a mason and really you think that is the measure of a man? What he does when no ones around? What he does in public is less than his other works? Hypothetically Gahndi for example amazing things but was awful to his wife and MLK would habitually cheat on his wife.
> 
> Brother,
> The meme is very simplistic and a life spent trying to improve oneself can’t be summarised in a quip. In my opinion
> ...


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## SCStrong (Nov 11, 2017)

Bro-greg said:


> Brother what town are you from


Florence.


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## David612 (Nov 11, 2017)

Brother JC said:


> @David612  Given your hypothetical scenarios my opinion of those men would drop quickly. Sure, they did good, but their character would be forever tarnished in my eyes.
> Andrew Jackson is a good example.


Thing is from what I have read the above is true but again I haven’t studied it hard enough to be 100% confident saying its fact, my point is that what makes a man is not what he does in private but rather it’s the sum of his actions in all arenas, no man is flawless but a mason should try to be.


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## Brother JC (Nov 11, 2017)

Jackson’s actually a poor example as his crimes against humanity are well documented.
Let us say that a man of a duplicitous nature is probably of lower character overall.


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## SCStrong (Nov 11, 2017)

So for me, the question comes to mind.......... can a man change his character?


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## David612 (Nov 11, 2017)

SCStrong said:


> So for me, the question comes to mind.......... can a man change his character?


I would say character can change gradually over time and experience, it’s a persistent mindset and this can’t come from an external source.


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## Bro-greg (Nov 12, 2017)

SCStrong said:


> Florence.


I live in Columbia but hail froM Goodhop lodge 376 Hemingway SC


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## Bro-greg (Nov 12, 2017)

As a mason I believe we are all striving to be better however, if one has questionable behavior he or she will be found out in due time


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## HoldenMonty (Nov 14, 2017)

This was the "sunday school" answer when I was in when somebody asked what integrity means... and that you learn a lot about a person about what they do when nobody is watching but I would add to it that you also learn the measure of a man by what he does the right thing even when it isn't the popular thing to do. For example the one Stealers player that stood in the tunnel with his hand over his heart when the rest of the team stayed in the locker room until after the national anthem.


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## Ripcord22A (Nov 14, 2017)

HoldenMonty said:


> This was the "sunday school" answer when I was in when somebody asked what integrity means... and that you learn a lot about a person about what they do when nobody is watching but I would add to it that you also learn the measure of a man by what he does the right thing even when it isn't the popular thing to do. For example the one Stealers player that stood in the tunnel with his hand over his heart when the rest of the team stayed in the locker room until after the national anthem.



Alrjandro Villanueva isn’t just “a Steelers player”. He’s a US ARMY RANGER


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## Bloke (Dec 4, 2017)

dfreybur said:


> Abusers are extremely secretive.  If my ex-wife had not drunk dialed my family to apologize for beating me, they would not have found out until I called them with my new address when I escaped.  Back then only a few of the Brothers at lodge knew what I was going through.  They helped me prepare to escape and when the time came they helped me move out.
> 
> Most of my ex's friends to this day think she's the nicest party girl in town.  hey have no idea what happens behind closed doors.


Also sorry to read of this Brother, but glad you left.


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## Bloke (Dec 4, 2017)

David612 said:


> Yes I am a mason and really you think that is the measure of a man? What he does when no ones around? What he does in public is less than his other works? Hypothetically Gahndi for example amazing things but was awful to his wife and MLK would habitually cheat on his wife.
> The meme is very simplistic and a life spent trying to improve oneself can’t be summarised in a quip. In my opinion
> Look into those examples for yourself as I’m no historian and there is a bit of controversy around them how true they are I have no idea but good food for thought.


I think the quote is about what a man does guided by his own integrity and values when no one is watching and the only judge of him will be himself (and the GAOTU, of you think the GAUTU observes and judges actions). I don't think its a quip, I think it's a very important statement.


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## coachn (Dec 4, 2017)

Yeah, the meme is simplistic for sure.  What I get from it is that your true character is not what you cautiously do in public.  Your true character is what you do when you're not in the public view and no longer putting up a façade. 

It's unfortunate that this meme used the term "true test".  It's not a true test.  It's your true character.  Your true character is acted out when you let your guard down, drop the façade and do what you would normally do free from the scrutiny of public eyes and the consequences thereof.


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## Bloke (Dec 4, 2017)

coachn said:


> Yeah, the meme is simplistic for sure.  What I get from it is that your true character is not what you cautiously do in public.  Your true character is what you do when you're not in the public view and no longer putting up a façade.
> 
> It's unfortunate that this meme used the term "true test".  It's not a true test.  It's your true character.  Your true character is acted out when you let your guard down, drop the façade and do what you would normally do free from the scrutiny of public eyes and the consequences thereof.



I think it is a really good meme, and can convey the tools to face a true test. I am sure as someone in a fiduciary position of trust, you've had the chance to do the wrong and the right thing where no one would probably know, and doing the wrong thing would give you advantage, yet you've done the right thing simply because it is right. It's when no one is watching that Character gets truly tested.

The message might be simple, but so are many in Freemasonry. As an oral teaching tradition, it is advantageous to make our complex messages simple. Like the simple words "Brotherhood", "Honour" and "Fraternity"  ,  these are simple single words, but what is needed to discharge them as obligations can be complex and difficult but rather than have a thesis on these we use single words, but they are built upon by the whole system of our degree lessons.


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