# How to avoid being WM?



## JMartinez (Mar 5, 2015)

Just like the title says. I've been a Mason for 4 years. I am now JW. I want to support the line up in front of me. I'm in my 20's. I'm a full-time student in college. I lack the respect of my brethren and the wisdom it would take to serve. My being nominated is a matter of lack of membership and members to fill the seats than that of merit. What do I do?


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## JJones (Mar 5, 2015)

Even if you don't believe they respect you, you may be surprised.  Failing that, they should respect the gavel if nothing else.

Still, I can understand your reasoning.  If the SW is already a Past Master (or even open minded) you might toss out the idea of everyone holding their position another year.  That, or you could just tell the incoming WM that you'd like to stay where you are or support the lodge in another capacity.


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## Mike Martin (Mar 6, 2015)

You should raise the issue with the Lodge Committee and tell them that you are not confidenet enough to progress so quickly and that it is putting unnecessary pressure on you. If your Lodge mates are worth their salt they will try to ease up and help you to progress more comfortably.


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## Jay Welch (Mar 6, 2015)

Hey Brother what you lack is not skill, knowledge , or experience. Its confidence . No matter what station in life you find yourself at you'll always be surrounded by forces greater than yourself. Its gonna be a long time before you're the oldest, wisest, and saltiest dog on the sea. If you wait for the time to be just right then life will pass right by. I personally know one the youngest DDGL's in the land. He was I think 22 or 23 when he took the post. Very young and green guy but he is the smartest guy in the room no matter who else is there. My point is don't be overly intimidated by these guys. If they didn't respect you then you wouldn't be  there!
Old guys have always and will always give the young guys a hard time. The good news is you can do the same when your old and crusty!
Enjoy your experience. Its gonna be ok they may kill ya but they cant eat ya !


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## JMartinez (Mar 6, 2015)

The thing that bothers me is that all my "brothers" belittle me. Because of my age I'm treated like a kid. Even though I do most of the fundraising, reach out to missing brethren, and never miss a meeting.


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## Jay Welch (Mar 6, 2015)

Well I don't condone any sort of disrespectful behavior , but I suggest throwing some jabs back. Look man I've made a life time of trying to figure out old men. Heres the deal its not that they think less of you or dislike you, the truth is probably the opposite. Im certain that they mean you no harm. Most likely they just see you as a green kid! Don't take it to heart too much. They're having some cheap fun with you ,so fight back. I would start with Viagra jokes, or maybe offer to come over and help em change the tennis balls on they're walker! Oh I'm sorry you couldn't hear me... everybody turn up your hearing aids! Have some fun with em and don't take it too serious. But please don't be discouraged Brother. Remember these are the very guys who elected you! Don't be hateful but don't be timid either. Good luck and please hang in there . We need young guys in the Craft!


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## dfreybur (Mar 6, 2015)

JMartinez said:


> The thing that bothers me is that all my "brothers" belittle me. Because of my age I'm treated like a kid. Even though I do most of the fundraising, reach out to missing brethren, and never miss a meeting.



"You're aware that the statement you just made means I'm not going to advance to the East in two years, right?  You spoke down to me.  Time for you to step up to fill the gap you just made.  Want to think about it a bit and try that statement again?"

It is the sort of statement that a WM needs to make on occasion.  Find within yourself the ability to say it and you will find within your brothers the ability to support you in your trip through the line.  Tough love.

We're brothers and brothers bicker in a lot of families.  But when push comes to shove we're there to support.  They aren't even aware they are pushing in the wrong direction.  Shove them a bit.  They don't even know the lessons of leadership they are about to teach you.  When they hear words like that from you, then they'll know.

Words or not they know you can do it.  They've just forgotten.  Bring their memory back to them.  We PMs tend to tell stories about our years in the East and forget the stories that lead us to the East.  Shove their memory a bit for when they were in your shoes.

Four years?  Argh.  Tossing our new brother from the pan into the fire.  You'll shine of course, but yikes the pace of it.


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## Jay Welch (Mar 6, 2015)

Sounds like you maybe simply overwhelmed with school and a new post in lodge and all the pressure that brings. Look when you feel that heat just don't forget to breath. And always remember " Slow is smooth , smooth is fast !" So don't let anyone else make you hurry.


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## Warrior1256 (Mar 6, 2015)

I'm in a similar position. After just 5 months as an MM I was appointed Senior Deacon. I will have to pay very close attention as I will be coming up on the WM position much sooner than I thought.


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## Jay Welch (Mar 6, 2015)

If you hang around the lodge much at all youre gonna get put to work. Best be ready to get called out! So much fun, I love it.


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## Warrior1256 (Mar 6, 2015)

Jay Welch said:


> If you hang around the lodge much at all youre gonna get put to work. Best be ready to get called out! So much fun, I love it.


Agreed. Joining Masonry is one of the best things that I ever did.


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## pointwithinacircle2 (Mar 6, 2015)

As JW it is time to start collecting support.  Start looking at the Brothers who are shaping opinions (getting their way) in your Lodge.  Begin speaking to these Brothers privately.  Discuss some issue in the Lodge and offer your opinion.  Pay attention to their responses.  Do they consider your position carefully and respond thoughtfully, or do they act like pushy blowhards?  (sorry but it happens)  Your job at this point is to take a progressive attitude toward the issues of the day and to begin to rally support for those issues.  Let me say that again - You are not taking a poll, you are convincing the Brothers of the right course of action, this is what a leader does.  This kind of behind the scenes data collection does three things.  First, it is crucial to understanding the condition of your Lodge.  Second, it prepares _you _to be a leader. Third, it prepares the Brothers to follow your lead on future issues.


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## Pscyclepath (Mar 6, 2015)

First of all, while it's expected that you continue in the line to become Master, it's not _required_ that you do so.  You have a choice, and (assuming you have a regular, continuing line of officers) should you decide not to continue on and to drop back to the sidelines, talk things over with your current Master and Senior Warden about your concerns.   Probably your Senior Deacon, too, since he's going to be affected as well. 

As with joining the Craft, it's of your own free will and accord that you take on any of the chairs.

I can empathize...   two orders of business after I turned in my Master's proficiency, I was brought west of the altar and installed as Junior Deacon, since the lodge had similar manpower shortages.  I've continued in the line since then, and started my term as Sr. Warden in December.  I got with the program,and decided to do the best job I could in each post.  As Sr. Deacon, I went outside the lodge and earned my officer proficiency and even instructor certifications,  busted my rear as junior warden, serving something like 40 banquet-type meals for from 30 to 130 members, and helping lecture & tutor new brothers at our own and at neighboring lodges.  At this point, if I make it to next year, I will be the firs fellow to have sat sequentially in all five chairs in a long, long time, and I have a pretty good team of folks coming up behind me.

My faith got shaken pretty hard back in January when a couple of the old biddies on the Rainbow Advisory Board got all ruffled up about the fact the the other wardens and I had noted a typo in a program for one of the girls' installations, and sicced the PM and Master to come ream me out.  Right about the same time, two of the past masters got riled at a practice session when I gently pointed out to them that their renditions of a part of the ritual were far, far away from the actual adopted work.  I got yelled at for that as well.  Lord, I thought, if something as petty as that gets them all riled up like that, well, I probably am not the right fellow to be sitting in the East next year.   I stewed on it for a day or so, talked it over with the two guys in line behind me, as well as a couple of my mentors, and decided to stay in the line, but be low key for the time being to see how everything plays out.   Next year's program is mostly in draft, and synced to our lodge's 5-year plan.  So I'm fairly confident for this and next year, if we're allowed to carry things out.

Becoming Master isn't something that you should walk into bare-handed.  I've done a lot of reading and study, watched other brothers in the position to try and pick up on both good ideas and bad (e.g., what seems to work well and what to avoid) by traveling out to a wide range of other lodges, studied and earned my proficiency and instructor certificates so as to be able to sit in and teach any chair, any degree, and worked hard to be a productive member in the lodge.  I've only been in the Craft for a little more than 3 years myself, so you've still got time now to subdue your passions and improve yourself.   I've found a couple of books that have really helped me, as well as picking up key lessons from my Royal Arch and Scottish Rite degrees.   

As for the harassment from the other brethren, don't be thin-skinned.  Our guys poke at each other in the same manner, usually in a joking way...   but you do need to discern that foggy line between joking and bullying.   The latter should never be allowed to happen in the lodge.  We all made a promise to whisper good counsel when needed, and these sorts of incidents are when we should do so, before it gets to the point where charges would be justified.

Search your feelings...  that little spark of leadership may still be within you.  Find a good mentor (or two or three) and fan that flame.

Tom Ezell
Senior Warden, Adoniram #288


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## Zack (Mar 6, 2015)

Wise counsel Bro. Ezell.  Wise counsel indeed.


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## rpbrown (Mar 9, 2015)

As the SW in our lodge, I will be moving to the East in July. I have been studying all of the openings and closings as well as planning my year for a few months now. The issue I have is my line officers below JW. I am going to have to put some men in place that may not be quite ready. This is because some of those that would be more qualified tend to not come regularly. My take on the officers is (1) they must be willing to accept the position and the duties that come with it (2) They must be able to make at least the stated meetings (3) they must be willing to help those behind them to prepare for the next year.
Now, I know that there are circumstances where someone may miss a stated meeting or two and that is fine, however, to miss the meetings because someone just doesn't want top go that night is not acceptable for a line officer, at least for me. Does that mean I am taking my duties and position too serious?


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## crono782 (Mar 9, 2015)

I am of the same mindset. If at all possible, I will not put someone in an office or on a committee if they are not regularly active. I've heard some say that they would be active if you have them something to do. This is where I would have my committees source outside help on projects. I just have a hard time putting the future of the lodge into the hands of someone who prioritizes prime time tv over the Lodge.


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## rpbrown (Mar 9, 2015)

crono782 said:


> I am of the same mindset. If at all possible, I will not put someone in an office or on a committee if they are not regularly active. I've heard some say that they would be active if you have them something to do. This is where I would have my committees source outside help on projects. I just have a hard time putting the future of the lodge into the hands of someone who prioritizes prime time tv over the Lodge.



My thoughts exactly


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## Bill Lins (Mar 9, 2015)

rpbrown said:


> to miss the meetings because someone just doesn't want to go that night is not acceptable for a line officer, at least for me. Does that mean I am taking my duties and position too serious?


Not at all. The officers of a Lodge must accept the responsibilities of their offices and, at the least, attend stated meetings unless work or family emergencies interfere. If they cannot, they should decline said offices.


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## JJones (Mar 9, 2015)

If a brother accepts a position then he's accepting the responsibilities associated with that position.  Sometimes you can't make a meeting and everyone will understand that (or they should!).  An officer who consistently can't attend meetings will cause other brothers to take on additional responsibilities or cause them to be neglected altogether.  Still, sometimes things come up.

What really grinds my gears are brethren who feel as though being absent for an office the majority of the year qualifies them to advance when elections roll around.


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## MasterMasonFromNV (Mar 10, 2015)

Take it in stride, it's a great honor being a WM.


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## dfreybur (Mar 10, 2015)

Bill_Lins77488 said:


> The officers of a Lodge must accept the responsibilities of their offices and, at the least, attend stated meetings unless work or family emergencies interfere. If they cannot, they should decline said offices.



Unless you're honest about that and the lodge is disparate for officers.  I did that one year during one of my trips through the line.  My second time through the line (first time in Illinois) I was going to be traveling for work for half a year.  They needed officers so badly I was installed as SD anyways.  I attended poorly half the year, well half the year then skipped to the SW chair.  Mister Toad's wild ride - SD, SW, WM, WM, TL, JD, JW, consolidate to form a lodge with a healthy line.  And a partridge in a pear tree!


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## Pscyclepath (Mar 11, 2015)

rpbrown said:


> As the SW in our lodge, I will be moving to the East in July. I have been studying all of the openings and closings as well as planning my year for a few months now. The issue I have is my line officers below JW. I am going to have to put some men in place that may not be quite ready. This is because some of those that would be more qualified tend to not come regularly. My take on the officers is (1) they must be willing to accept the position and the duties that come with it (2) They must be able to make at least the stated meetings (3) they must be willing to help those behind them to prepare for the next year.
> Now, I know that there are circumstances where someone may miss a stated meeting or two and that is fine, however, to miss the meetings because someone just doesn't want top go that night is not acceptable for a line officer, at least for me. Does that mean I am taking my duties and position too serious?



Yep...  if the guys coming up behind me aren't ready, it's my job as SW to help them get prepared...  by learning the necessary ritual, and coaching through a lot of the tasks they'll have deal with when the time comes along...


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## Warrior1256 (Mar 11, 2015)

Bill_Lins77488 said:


> Not at all. The officers of a Lodge must accept the responsibilities of their offices and, at the least, attend stated meetings unless work or family emergencies interfere. If they cannot, they should decline said offices.


Agreed!


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## Bill Lins (Mar 11, 2015)

dfreybur said:


> Unless you're honest about that and the lodge is disparate for officers.  I did that one year during one of my trips through the line.  My second time through the line (first time in Illinois) I was going to be traveling for work for half a year.  They needed officers so badly I was installed as SD anyways.


That's an entirely different situation than what the OP described. I had the same experience one year. I was asked to serve as SD during a year in which the then-GM desired DIs to make official visits of our own plus attend every DDGM OV, during which we were to grade each Lodge on their proficiency in the opening & closing ritual and the reception of the DDGM. In my case, that meant 27 visits. I explained my situation to the WM, who stated that he'd like for me to serve regardless, even though I would miss most of their meetings. On that basis, I agreed to serve the best that I could.


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## Warrior1256 (Mar 17, 2015)

Bill_Lins77488 said:


> That's an entirely different situation than what the OP described. I had the same experience one year. I was asked to serve as SD during a year in which the then-GM desired DIs to make official visits of our own plus attend every DDGM OV, during which we were to grade each Lodge on their proficiency in the opening & closing ritual and the reception of the DDGM. In my case, that meant 27 visits. I explained my situation to the WM, who stated that he'd like for me to serve regardless, even though I would miss most of their meetings. On that basis, I agreed to serve the best that I could.


You told them streight out what the circumstances were and they wanted you anyway. Good deal.


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## Roy Vance (Apr 2, 2015)

JMartinez said:


> _Just like the title says. I've been a Mason for 4 years. I am now JW. I want to support the line up in front of me. I'm in my 20's. I'm a full-time student in college. I lack the respect of my brethren and the wisdom it would take to serve. My being nominated is a matter of lack of membership and members to fill the seats than that of merit. What do I do?_


 
I am going to offer my opinion without reading another post, only because I have been witness to just this circumstance. One of my Brothers was in the West chair and was nominated for the East. This was the Brother's explanation; "I regretfully decline the nomination for the reason that I feel that I am not yet qualified to advance to the East, yet. I am too new a Mason to be ready to be in charge of this Lodge, but, Thank You." If you don't think you would be able to put the amount of time and effort required for the Chair, due to other obligations, then all you should be able to do is decline the nomination. At least I would think so. If it is a matter of not enough active attendance, the current WM could hold over when it is time for you to move to the East, if you really think you are not ready. You could make that suggestion when the time comes.


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## Rifleman1776 (Apr 10, 2015)

JMartinez said:


> The thing that bothers me is that all my "brothers" belittle me. Because of my age I'm treated like a kid. Even though I do most of the fundraising, reach out to missing brethren, and never miss a meeting.


 Bro. J, the "belittle" part is probably good natured jesting of a young member by your elders. I certainty hope it is not meant to be hurtful. Show your maturity by ignoring it and moving on as you feel ready.


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