# Need your prayers



## cemab4y (Aug 31, 2015)

My brothers, ten (10) years of service in Iraq/Afghanistan have taken a toll on me. I have had two co-workers killed, and a friend lost a hand in combat. I have seen a man explode right in front of me. I have had several close calls, and I have almost been killed several times. Only by luck and the grace of the Supreme Architect, am I still alive.

I have suffered a severe mental breakdown, and I crawled into bed with a plastic bag, ready to make the final journey.

Fortunately, the Veterans administration, and the Defense Department is taking mental illness seriously. Each day, twenty (20) veterans of Iraq/Afghanistan commit suicide. This does include civilian contractors who have also crossed over.

I am getting the help I need to recover, and to control the depression, which is gripping me, and has done so for the last 20 years.

Imagine living with a growling, snarling beast, that can destroy you in ten seconds. The beast is temporarily controlled with drugs, but the drugs can fail.

I am at a Veteran’s Affairs facility in Maryland, trying to make the journey back to mental health. I often have severe crying spells, and I have to be sedated.

Please keep Larisa and me in your prayers.

Freedom is not free. We each pay for the privilege in different ways.

Charles E. Martin
Perry Point Maryland


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## BroBook (Aug 31, 2015)

My prayers are with my BROTHER, May one day mankind again dwell in unity, realizing that THE GAOTU Can see us, and if we want our children to have eternal life we must teach them in their ( pre- youth) one day there will be PEACE!!!


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## Erickson Ybarra (Aug 31, 2015)

I really don't know what to say but I want you to know I'm with you brother.


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## Ripcord22A (Aug 31, 2015)

What branch did you serve with?  You had 10 yrs worth of deployments?  That's crazy!  Ive know career rangers that never gotta much time.  Prayers for your recovery!


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## MarkR (Sep 3, 2015)

jdmadsenCraterlake211 said:


> What branch did you serve with?  You had 10 yrs worth of deployments?  That's crazy!  Ive know career rangers that never gotta much time.  Prayers for your recovery!


He was a civilian contractor.


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## dfreybur (Sep 3, 2015)

MarkR said:


> He was a civilian contractor.



Every one of those I have met so far (state side only, my hitch was very long ago) was prior military.  Go back long enough ago and they were in other theaters and tended to use the word mercenary for themselves.  In the 1970s I remember encountering an old timer WWII pilot who still took flying gigs in Angola.


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## cemab4y (Sep 3, 2015)

I was on active duty from 1973-1978 US Air Force. I was proud to serve as a civilian from 2004-2015


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## Ripcord22A (Sep 3, 2015)

What type of contractor?


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## MarkR (Sep 4, 2015)

dfreybur said:


> Every one of those I have met so far (state side only, my hitch was very long ago) was prior military.  Go back long enough ago and they were in other theaters and tended to use the word mercenary for themselves.  In the 1970s I remember encountering an old timer WWII pilot who still took flying gigs in Angola.


I've known contractors, particularly in training of law enforcement, who never served in the military, but I knew that Brother Martin had.  I was just responding to the question about serving in-theater for such an extended period of time.


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## Warrior1256 (Sep 4, 2015)

You will most certainly get prayers from me brother.


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## HumbleTXMason (Sep 4, 2015)

@cemab4y 

you are in my prayers, brother


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## dfreybur (Sep 4, 2015)

More prayers.


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## nixxon2000 (Sep 4, 2015)

Prayers sent to you


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## ej6267 (Sep 5, 2015)

Hang in there, my brother, keep up with the therapy. Better days will come. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


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## STETSON (Sep 5, 2015)

I will light a St Jude candle for you and Larisa...May God and all your Brothers support you in any way..


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## Keith D. McKeever Jr. (Sep 11, 2015)

You and your family are definitely in my prayers! I know what you are going thru and I'm here to tell you that you have to stay strong!...I know it's easily said than done but you to continue to put one foot in front of the other and continue to keep pushing Brother!


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## Glen Cook (Sep 11, 2015)

You were in my prayers just now.  Can I suggest that while not trained, we're are here as listening, caring, individuals who can  ease the burden and give a reason not to find the black hole attractive.  FaceTime is free


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## Akiles (Sep 12, 2015)

You're in my prayers 


Saludos.


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## cemab4y (Sep 27, 2015)

I am on the road to recovery. If anyone is interested in the kind of work I have been doing in Iraq/Afghanistan/Kuwait, please see my blog

http://www.cemab4y.blogspot.com

I am still in the hospital at Perry Point Maryland. I have reached out to the local lodge here, and the brothers have been terrific. I could not have made the steps here, without their support. Harmony Lodge in Port Deposit MD, has been more than generous. God bless their lodge, and Masons worldwide.


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## cemab4y (Oct 10, 2015)

I have been in hospital abt2months.  I am on a variety of drugs. I will possibly be getting. Electro shock.

I am trying to make it back.  There may be some good to come out of the school shootings. Our nation may improve our mental health treatment


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## Glen Cook (Oct 10, 2015)

ECT has a very high success rate in treating severe refractory depression. Before any more silliness is posted, see http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/brain-stimulation-therapies/brain-stimulation-therapies.shtml

You continue to be in my prayers.


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## cemab4y (Oct 12, 2015)

I am going to be evaluated for the ect treatment on 13 oct.


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## cemab4y (Oct 16, 2015)

I have been here for abt 8wks I am going in for the electric shock treatments on Monday October 19


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## Peck1988 (Oct 16, 2015)

cemab4y said:


> My brothers, ten (10) years of service in Iraq/Afghanistan have taken a toll on me. I have had two co-workers killed, and a friend lost a hand in combat. I have seen a man explode right in front of me. I have had several close calls, and I have almost been killed several times. Only by luck and the grace of the Supreme Architect, am I still alive.
> 
> I have suffered a severe mental breakdown, and I crawled into bed with a plastic bag, ready to make the final journey.
> 
> ...




Hello my brother

My name is Scott am 27, I live in the UK, England
I work as a security officer in my local hospital,
Part of my job role is simple things like car parking, site patrols just making sure everything is ok, the other part is dealing with everything from drunks, drug users and also mental health, in my 9 years I've seen the effects of mental health, I've seen everything from overdoses, self harm also people who want to harm people, even mothers who try to harm their new born baby I've had to stand (well sit) guard and watch every move the mother makes, a number of times I've had to rush a room with people trying to cut them selfs or trying to attack staff, after 9 years I've come to respect anyone who is dealing with mental health, brother remember you are not alone always talk, never be afraid to talk, even doh my situation is not like yours I've seen things that will stick with me for life I found just talking to my partner and even just getting her to hug me why I cry has helped never let your ego get in the way, never hold it in,  just because someone else got over their situation quicker doesn't mean there's no hope, you will be in my prays my brother.

Look to the east, find the bright star, walk with me my brother and we shall find the light we seek.


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## Blake Bowden (Oct 16, 2015)

Thoughts and prayers my Brother. Please let me know if we can be of assistance.


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## cemab4y (Oct 16, 2015)

If anyone is in the Baltimore
Md area I would be delighted to have a visitor
Also if anyone is in the WashDC area, my wife is having a difficult time
And a visit would help her as well.

My church has been terrific, even donating some items. For the vets here.

Many of the vets here, have alcohol and drug issues,and the drink coffee. The local lodge donated some coffee and sugar.

Also we love candy, and the,lodge donated some candy.


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## cemab4y (Oct 20, 2015)

I will receive my first electro shock treatment om Weds 21 Oct.


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## cemab4y (Oct 21, 2015)

I got the first electric shock treatment today. I did not feel a thing, I was anesthesized. Only side effect is my jaw muscles are weak and sore.

I have connected with a lodge here in Baltimore, and I believe I will get a visit soon. I have everything I need here, but the vets can always use games, playing cards, toiletries, etc.


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## NY.Light.II (Oct 21, 2015)

You are in my thoughts.


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## Derek Harvey (Oct 28, 2015)

You have my prayers brother. I too am a veteran. It can be hard sometime. Try focusing on where you are going instead of where you have been. Don't forget your experience because it's a part of you. Start looking to your future. Your brothers are always here for you.


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## cemab4y (Nov 2, 2015)

I completed the 6th of 6 shock treatments today. I will relocate to the VA hospital at Perry Point MD, for a week or so. The end of the hospitalization is in sight.


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