Attending Lodge Meetings Under The Influence

[Gomabxi]

Hello Brothers.
During refreshments I was instructed by the WM to speak to a Brother about coming to the meetings under the influence of alcohol. Days later I called him and was being very polite about the issue. Before I could get to the point he told me it was inappropriate for him to attend lodge meetings in that condition. He also told me that he was a PM and he understood. We spoke for a little while on the phone. I told him that I would see him at the next meeting. He replied "I'll be there". I thought the conversation had gone well, no harm done. Well, it has been at least three months and he has not attended another meeting since. He attended meetings regularly until we spoke on the phone. My thoughts are to call him and mend any hard feelings that I may have caused. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Bill Lins]

I'm sorry, but if he had to be told not to come to Lodge drunk it doesn't sound to me that y'all have lost much by his absence. I'd contact him every couple of months or so just to let him know that the Lodge will be ready to receive him whenever he gets himself squared away and that he hasn't been forgotten. Other than that, it's up to him to decide that he has a problem that he needs to get straightened out.

 

[Jericho2013]

He may be in need of help too. He may have an alcohol problem for any number of reasons. I would let him know if he is in distress and in need of any help that the brothers are there for him. Also the reason he is not attending now could be due to embarrassment. If more than one brother reaches out to him it may make him feel more confident and comfortable to come back.

 

[JohnnyFlotsam]

This is sad, on many levels.
Yes, you should definitely call him, better yet (if possible), meet in person and make it plain that this Brother's absence is felt. Offer to do what you can to help him deal with his problem so that both Brother and Lodge are the better for it. Still, keep in mind that, as others have already pointed out, the bulk of the "work" that needs to be done for this man can only be done by this man.

 

[JTM]

I'm sorry, but if he had to be told not to come to Lodge drunk it doesn't sound to me that y'all have lost much by his absence. I'd contact him every couple of months or so just to let him know that the Lodge will be ready to receive him whenever he gets himself squared away and that he hasn't been forgotten. Other than that, it's up to him to decide that he has a problem that he needs to get straightened out.

i'm with bill.

 

[dfreybur]

Had he been drinking before one meeting in the last year or two or had it become a regular status? I'd react differently in those two situations.

If it only happened once I'd offer to go have a beer with him after a meeting if he wanted a drink the evening of a meeting.

If it has become regular I'd offer moral support gently in his ear. It is up to him to take the step but it helps to know his brothers are rooting for him to do so.

 

[Gomabxi]

I'm sorry, but if he had to be told not to come to Lodge drunk it doesn't sound to me that y'all have lost much by his absence. I'd contact him every couple of months or so just to let him know that the Lodge will be ready to receive him whenever he gets himself squared away and that he hasn't been forgotten. Other than that, it's up to him to decide that he has a problem that he needs to get straightened out.

Thanks Brother Bill


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[Gomabxi]

Thank to all you Brothers. Sorry, I did not see all the replies.


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